I knew it wasn’t him (Part 2)….

I hope each of you has had a wonderful week. I prayed for all of you.

Where were we... Oh yes, I was staring into the eyes of what I know to be the Lord.

As I stood there, it was as if time was standing still. I know it wasn't a long period of time, but it felt like a lifetime. My heart was pounding in my chest, and it was almost as if I was aware of my breathing, my heartbeat, and this overwhelming force that was filling me.

Although I knew it was Him, it was Willard who was staring at me, and then he started to speak.

"How are you? We have been thinking of you."

That was it—two sentences. Small ones, but the power of those two sentences shook me. It wasn't, I have been thinking of you; it was we. I was able to squeak out, "We are doing okay." It was as if I knew what he was asking. I knew he was asking about my wife and me. I knew that then, and I am convinced of it today. It wasn't like someone you run into at the store who says, "How are you? How is your wife? Oh, we've been praying for you." This was profound. It was powerful, and it shook me.

With that, he went back to what he was doing, and I walked to my truck, trying to catch my breath as tears formed in my eyes. It was so powerful. I called my wife right there and said, "I don't know how to say this, but I think I just spoke to the Lord." She, not knowing me to be someone who likes to speak about these kinds of things, first asked if I was okay. I told her this exact story, and she walked through it with me again.

Right afterward, I texted my friends and asked if they believed that the Lord would actually speak with people. They are strong believers and agreed that He would. I told them the story later that night. 

That was the last time I told this story, until now.

What I have not said out loud yet is where I was in the moments before this. I remember pulling into Kroger to get groceries and thinking, I'm not sure I can carry on. I was at the end. I didn't know why any of this was happening. I thought to myself, Has the Lord forgotten about us? Has He left us? Does He even care?

I had many conversations with my friend group about that very thing, and even though I always told them that I felt like the Lord was with us, it was just lip service. I had lost my way. I wasn't sure where I was going to go from that point. I felt numb.

It was in that moment that the Lord chose to speak with me. To tell me that I was not alone. That He was thinking of me. It gave me confidence for what was to come. I won't sit here and write that everything was perfect from that point forward, but I knew from then on that I was never alone. Even when we experienced great loss in the future, I never doubted that He was with me. I would be angry with Him at times, but I always knew He was there.

As the days passed, I will say that I became the skeptic once more. Even though I believed this story with my whole heart, the human in me wanted proof. I haven't told this part of the story before, so to my friends who may be reading this—don't laugh.

The skeptical human in me said, "He just meant that he and his church were thinking of you. You're on so many prayer lists. It must have come from that."

So I decided to do a series of tests.

I want you to know that I didn't do this because I didn't believe. It was almost as if I craved that feeling again and wanted it to be true so badly. The proof wasn't for my faith—it was to silence the skeptic within me.

So I did what any crazy person would do and started going to that store all the time. I would go there for no reason. I would walk past Willard and then walk back again. One day I lingered while he was working in the parking lot, cleaning up a disgusting mess that had come from the dumpster. I literally stood in garbage water running across the parking lot, hoping this young man would say something again.

Again and again, I went back and purposely crossed paths with Willard, hoping he would say that he was praying for us or ask how my wife was doing again. If he had, then the skeptic would have been right. It wasn't the Lord—it was just a man.

It never happened.

In fact, he never stopped to speak with me again. To this day, when I see Willard, he simply says hello, just as he does with every customer. He has never mentioned that encounter again. He has never had another conversation with me. I even purposely said hello and tried to talk with him once, but he simply went back to his work. I could have been arrested as a stalker.

I came to one conclusion...

Our God is an awesome God.

He is with us in all things. He thinks about us in the good times and in the difficult ones. He loves us more than we, as humans, will ever understand.

I am not alone.

I am loved.

I have a Heavenly Father who will always be there.

That is a powerful feeling.

That is a peaceful feeling.

That is love.

Our journey was not over, and we had many scares beyond this point. But from that day forward, I knew we were going to be okay. He gave me strength and confidence again—all through His presence and two simple sentences.

Talk again soon...